Piers Corbyn, Anti-Maskers Shut Down Lucha Libre Wrestling Meet

Violence broke out last night as a group of anti-mask campaigners led by Piers Corbyn, brother of former Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn, attempted to shut down a lucha libre wrestling practice in North London.

Anti-maskers gathered outside the Fight Factory gym in North London, home to the El Luchos Luchador wrestling team, carrying placards adorned with anti-mask slogans such as ‘no submissions’ and ‘masks = murder’.

Police were soon forced to intervene after the campaigners tried to prevent the masked Mexican wrestlers from entering the gym. Understandably outraged, the luchadors retaliated, attacking the protestors with chokeholds, clotheslines and suplexes, with one unlucky protestor finding himself on the receiving end of a 619.

Manuel, a member of El Luchos Luchador, told reporters: ‘I couldn’t believe it man, this crazy old guy comes out and says you can’t use the gym unless you take off your masks, so I said fuck you old man and poked that motherf***ers eyes out.’

Peter Hunt, the man on the business end of Manuel’s gouging was later taken to hospital with severe eye injuries but found himself dishonourably discharged following a dispute with NHS staff. After nurses recommended that he wear an eyepatch, the father of two flew into a violent rage, yelling at staff and calling them ‘sheeple’. Peter was seemingly angered by the suggestion of an eyepatch, stating that he refuses to wear a face covering of any kind.

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