Fake News Desk

EXCLUSIVE: The REAL Reason Why the Rwanda Flights Were Cancelled

A stunning leak from Number 10 has shed new light on the Rwanda flight debacle which unfolded earlier this week and has revealed the real reason that the Rwanda flights failed to take off. According to sources, Government plans to send refugees to Rwanda earlier were scuppered at the last minute after the contracted airline was revealed not to have any planes in its fleet.

The ‘airline’ in question was reportedly recommended to Priti Patel by former Transport Minister, Chris Grayling, who oversaw the Seaborne Freight scandal back in 2019. When asked for comment, the company that was awarded the contract, ‘Rwanda Hairlines,’ said they had been unable to build the planes in time due to supply chain issues and were not willing to offer refunds as they would then have to employ someone to process them. A closer examination revealed the company to be registered to a small hair salon in downtown Kigali, Rwanda.

Exactly how this comedy of errors occurred has not yet been uncovered, though, it’s almost certainly nothing to do with Chris Grayling. With the PM’s approval, Priti Patel has reportedly been floating the prospect of a lordship to anyone who comes forward with information about the parties at fault.

Questioned about the fiasco on Tuesday evening, Patel told reporters: ‘I can’t see what’s so problematic about taking asylum seekers and shipping them 4000 miles away to a Central African nation with a highly questionable human rights record, it shouldn’t be that hard.’

‘If it’s okay for Arsenal fans to visit Rwanda, then why not foreign scum, sorry, illegal immigrants,’ she later added.

The latest setback is just one of many that have befallen the government’s controversial plan. Hours before the take-off was scheduled, a team of highly skilled international lawyers attempted to block the move by setting up camp outside of the detention centre which was housing the passengers, however, it soon became apparent that they were wasting their time when news filtered through that there were no planes to take the reluctant passengers to Rwanda in the first place.

There had been a glimmer of hope when a forward-thinking minister was revealed to have agreed on a deal with Easyjet as a backup. However, their London to Rwanda flight was cancelled last minute due to ‘Covid-related staff shortages,’ while Ryanair refused the opportunity, citing ‘Tory scum.’

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