Tag: vaccine

Fake News Desk

Bill and Melinda Gates in Custody Fight over Mind-Controlled Masses

Following the news that Bill and Melinda Gates will be separating, speculation has been swirling over which of the two will win custody of the microchipped masses now roaming the planet. Prior to the split, the richest couple in the world were able to guide recipients of their mind control vaccine with extreme ease from their subterranean lair in Lake Medina, Washington. Using microchips contained … Continue reading Bill and Melinda Gates in Custody Fight over Mind-Controlled Masses

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Fake News Desk

Jamaica Suspends Use of AstraZeneca Vaccine After Reports of Bludclarts

Jamaica has become the latest country to suspend use of the AstraZeneca Covid-19 vaccine, following in the footsteps of France, Italy and the Netherlands, after widespread reports of bludclarts. After a bludclart reportedly left one man fi dead, health officials from the island nation have stated that ‘wi nuh need di bludcart AstraZeneca vaccine fi wi,’ and that they will look to alternative suppliers going … Continue reading Jamaica Suspends Use of AstraZeneca Vaccine After Reports of Bludclarts

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Fake News Desk

52% of Brits Support Vaccine Passports on Condition That They’re Blue

Concerns that vaccine passports are part of an ‘Orwellian’ plot to control and subjugate the British population were alleviated last night after MPs confirmed that they will be blue.  According to YouGov polling, 52% of the British population now support the plan – representing a clear and overwhelming majority of Britons. Mary from Berwick-upon-Tweed commented that the blue vaccine passports made her feel warm and … Continue reading 52% of Brits Support Vaccine Passports on Condition That They’re Blue

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